Before Caffeine:
- Patton: Thank you guys for coming, everything ok? All is good up here except for the fucking tropical temperature. Where are we in fucking Kuala Lumpur?

Before Last Cup Of Sorrow:
- Roddy: It's been an awful long time
- Patton: That must be why

Before I Started A Joke:
- Patton: OK. Alright. Looks like the crowd is mostly boys out there no?
- Roddy: No, look at the front row.
- Patton: Exactly
- Roddy: I see lotsa lotsa lotsa lotsa...
- Patton: I see nothing but... well... no no no you don't have to prove it.

After Ashes To Ashes:
- Patton: Edinburgh! Edinburgh, you've been great, thank you for listening. Special thanks to Oceansize for playing with us. Very good to see you after all these years.

Before Just A Man:
- Patton: OK knobos, we've got one more. I'm sorry is knobos a bad things to say? I didn't think so because you brought a knobo and you look really happy. This guy wearing a Run DMC shirt. It looks like it's... oh it's ball... it says ??? The fuck does that mean? That means I'm a knob! It's ok. I would think it's pretty much safe to say that we're all knobs in this joint. Give a hand to ourselves huh?
- Roddy: To us! All of us, united.
- Patton: You guys are suffering this as much as we are right? Maybe more.
- * Patton points at woman on someone's shoulders in the crowd*
- Patton: What are you looking at?! Oh, she's getting mad.

During Just A Man intro Patton pulls someone on stage to help sing, "You wanna sing this next song? You wanna help me sing?"

During end of Just A Man Patton grabs a bouncers headset and says, "Hello yes, uh, we've got a problem at the back of the house. This uh, this Englishman who all the Scottish wanna kill. He's got an English flag. And uh, he's got his dick out, and I think you might want to arrest him."

After Just A Man:
- Roddy: Thanks for having us back, you guys are great. Thanks so much.

Before Mark Bowen:
- Roddy: Ladies and gentlemen you are too kind! We got all hot and shit.
- *Patton arrives on stage with his shirt off*
- Patton: I'm going all all Chris Cornell and shit!
- Roddy: Oh look at you. Fuck yeah!
- Patton: I wish I had the hair that he had, but hey, you can't win 'em all.
- Roddy: You just need a crimping iron and you're all set.
- Patton: I've got a good pecker, don't you worry about that.
- Roddy: We're gonna play some more music, that's why we came back. Big fuckin' surprise right!
- Patton: Hey hey, will you give us a break? We're fucking old men okay?
- Bill: Do you like, hate old people around here? Is that why you boo at old people when you walk down the street?
- Roddy: You don't like old people?
- Bill: Respect your elders!
- Patton: Would you give your bus seat up for Bill Gould?

Before Stripsearch:
- Roddy: Need some help getting out of there? You alright? Where's the cane? Where's your cane, Jesus Christ! Where's his cane?! Man needs his cane, Jesus Christ.
- Patton: You'll understand when you get to me my age you fucking little kids.
- Roddy: Ah you little belly achers. You little whipper snappers.
- Patton: When I was your age!
- Roddy: We had to ride our bikes to the record stores back then.
- Patton: Ride our bikes? I didn't even have a bike!
- Roddy: We didn't have any MP3 shit. Got to the store and buy...
- Patton: I used to have to sell my ass to get a ride when I was hitchhiking to the record store. Therefore my asshole is ruined because I love music!

Ole ole sample before Chariots.